Chapter 3

___________{Chapter 3}____________

“One’s outlook in life is paramount to one’s success.”
- HCJ

oon after my grandfather’s death and the end of my fourth grade school year, we returned to New York City. Once again, the economic condition in Puerto Rico had proved to be unfavorable for my parents to sustain their family.

Until my parents could find employment, my brother and I were left behind under the care of my paternal grandmother, Adriana. A while later our parents sent for us. We arrived at my Aunt Luz’s apartment, my dad’s younger sister, and would reside in her home with our parent’s for several weeks.

We shared a two-bedroom, one bathroom, kitchen, and living room apartment with my aunt, her husband, and their four young children; my cousins Sandy, Carla, Peter, and Vicky. Later, they would have a fifth child, Judy. These were cramp living conditions, but for children, it was a great deal of fun.

Shortly afterward, my parents found a separate apartment for us in Manhattan’s “seeded,” lower east side. It was on the ground floor of a six-story building. I recall that it was a cold and snowy winter when we moved in. At the time, my parents were short of funds to purchase a refrigerator, so as he was often prone to do, my father improvised. He built a small wooden platform on the outside ledge of the kitchen’s window. There, for short periods, we would keep perishable food, like milk and eggs. As the phrase goes, “Necessity is the mother of invention.”

Since we had very little money and possessions, we took advantage of any opportunity, like thrown out old furniture. We would promptly lug such finds back to our apartment. I cannot make this up, such was our financial condition, although we, that is my brother and me, never felt deprived. Our parents made sure that we always had a roof over our heads, plenty to eat, clean clothes, and all the love we wanted.

Economic instability would prove to be a temporary circumstance for us. Within the year, my parent’s jobs and income had substantially improved and allowed us to move to a better apartment. Even though it was small and on the third floor of a six-story building, it was in a slightly safer neighborhood.

Next, my parents enrolled my brother and me at “Immaculate Conception,” a Catholic school just several blocks walking distance from our apartment. There, during our initial enrollment interview, the sisters in charge deemed both of us deficient in some manner. We never knew what this was. Albeit, the result was that both of us were set back a grade.

At the time, I couldn’t understand that action, although it worked out for the best. From that moment forth, my brother and I would be intellectually and emotionally ahead of our classmates.

We still lived in a questionable part of town and were exposed to things that children should not have to see or experience. As the incident when my brother and I were walking home from school and witnessed a woman holding a syringe in one of her hands, lift her blouse, exposing her abdomen and breast, and inject herself.

Money wise, life was well enough that my father purchased a used nineteen sixty Chevrolet Impala, and over the summer would take my mom and us on short weekend drives throughout the city.

But our parents were not satisfied. They wanted safer and better living conditions for us. Hence, once more they chose to pack up our belongings, and move the family across the Hudson River, to nearby Perth Amboy, New Jersey, some forty minutes south of Manhattan.

* * * * *

At this moment, I share with you a philosophical tenet; I have personally adhered to over the last thirty years. I came across it during a television news interview of a man who had not only lost his job but also the weathered house he, his wife and children called home, his aging car, and remaining material possessions they owned, the aftermath of a hurricane.

I remember the man’s response to the question posed to him by the reporter interviewing him for the evening news. To the best of my recollection, the question was something like, “How do you feel and recover from this horrific event that has now left you destitute, completely poor?”

His response changed the way I thought of and looked at life forever. He more or less answered as follows, “It might seem to many that I have lost all that I’ve got, but this is just an illusion. As long as I have my children, spouse, family, friends, and most importantly, God in my life, I will never be poor.”

By the look on the reporter’s face, I can assure you that neither he expected that answer, nor did I. For me, this man’s wisdom and the ability to discern what matters, would shed light on the dignity and astuteness of an individual grounded in the bonds of love, loyalty, and affection.

In such a person’s approach to life, nothing is ever lacking. Today, many covet knowledge and the unending accumulation of facts with an oblivious disregard for wisdom, arguably our most important intangible asset.

The lesson I learned on that day from this stranger was that for most of us, being poor is nothing more than and can be reduced to a “state of mind.” Maybe I did not choose the extraneous circumstance life might have dealt me, such as being born poverty-stricken in a developing nation, growing up in a dysfunctional family or suffering from some illness. But my response to any situation based on a spiritual foundation and practice will greatly enhance my ability to cope with most of life’s predicaments.

As the expression on how we look at life goes, “Is your glass half empty or half full?” Because of this stranger’s outlook on life, I have made it a point, regardless of the contingency, to live life from the optimistic “half-full” point of view.

This is a conscious choice, which requires me to be aware of and thankful for all of life. Especially those difficult times, which are fraught with distress, anger, or pain. For most often, it is within the difficult that the potential for growth and understanding lies.

If we then progressively cultivate a disposition based on being grateful for what comes our way, what we have, and the goodness within and around us, the thoughts of completeness and abundance begins to pervade who we are. Our innate mind recalls its inherent nature of the oneness with all. Our inner thoughts and outer response become more and more congruent. We start living from our authentic self. Life becomes easier as our truth and wisdom shine through.

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